de·serve (d-zûrv) v. tr. To be worthy of; merit
"I deserve more than you can give me."
"I don't deserve to be treated this way!"
"You deserve a promotion after all the hard work you have done."
"I deserve to live without fear."
"I deserve a decent place to stay!"
"I deserve to be able to do whatever I want!"
"I deserve equal treatment and equal pay!"
"I deserve the right to live!"
"It sounded old. Deserve. Old, tired and beaten to death...he was always saying or thinking he didn't deserve some bad luck or some bad treatment from others...Apparently he thought he deserved only to be loved-from a distance, though-and given what he wanted....Maybe all he was really saying was: I am not responsible for your pain; share your happiness with me but not your unhappiness." -Milkman "Song of Solomon"
I think that sometimes it's easy to get confused between what we think we deserve and what we actually deserve. I've been reading Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison and as I near the end of it I watch the character Milkman and his views about how he thinks his life should be and what he deserves. Then I look at my life and think about what I THINK I deserve. In the things we truly deserve there is a truth and a rightness that can't be denied when it hasn't been attained. It's that same thing that keeps us trying. And then I realize where the real cause of my frustration comes from. It isn't from not getting what I actually deserve. It's about not getting the things I think I deserve. When I look deep into my reasons and my logic I realize how unjustified they are, how selfish they can be, and how they can consume my thoughts with their superficiality, I'm sometimes shocked. Then when I do get something I don't deserve how I can be sooo self-righteous, like it should have been mine in the first place completely missing the fact that is was a gift and unearned and unmeritted.
What do you deserve?
Tanika's Relationship Tip#11: Suprising the other person with thoughtfulness. In any relationship (friendship or romantic) sometimes it's easy to get bogged (*small chuckle* sorry Daniel) down with the mundane things of everyday life. That's why I think it's important to think about the little things that make the other person happy and when possible and within reason, surprising your significant other with small acts of kindness that bring joy to them and to you. Like opening the door to the UPS man and getting a package and not realizing it's for you because it isn't your birthday yet and it's not Christmas and opening and seeing one of your most favoritest things in the whole wide world inside. I guess it's really about thinking about the other person and not just focusing on what yourself and what you can get out of the relationship, but how you can appreciate the other person. Or instead of going to KFC and saying "I'm sure you'll find something you can eat." knowing they are a vegetarian you could try that new Vegan restaurant up the street (As long as it wouldn't annoy you or anything, and even if it does get over it). And whatever it is should be something that feels natural and comfortable to you as well otherwise it will seem like some sort of chore and it really isn't because it's you just trying to make some else feel better and at the same time nuture the relationship you have together.
Toodles for now and as always have a good day and enjoy.
I am 50% Left Brain and 50% Right Brain. Interesting...
| You Are 50% Left Brained, 50% Right Brained |
 Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others. If you're left brained, you are likely good at math and logic. Your left brain prefers dogs, reading, and quiet. The right side of your brain is all about creativity and flexibility. Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way. If you're right brained, you likely have a talent for creative writing and art. Your right brain prefers day dreaming, philosophy, and sports. |
4 comments:
No problem donna. I'm still think about it myself.
I think I be deservin' a littah respec. All insultin' my fam'ly honah, whazupwi dat? ;-)
(I think that might be another example of hickbonics btw... Also when I thought of that, I thought of the old south, southerners on a plantation slapping each other on the face with white gloves... but you must have known I would think of that, because then you mentioned KFC, the colonel and all you know. Yeah, I don't think I got enough sleep last night.)
Just wanted to tell you I liked this. All of it. Good stuff.
Daniel,
You are hilalrious. I love your hikbonics. Dagnabit. Anyhoo yeah sorry I wasn't thinking of you when I wrote about the colonel. But could slap you on the face with a white glove if it makes you feel better.
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