I am 50% Left Brain and 50% Right Brain. Interesting...

You Are 50% Left Brained, 50% Right Brained
The left side of your brain controls verbal ability, attention to detail, and reasoning.
Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others.
If you're left brained, you are likely good at math and logic.
Your left brain prefers dogs, reading, and quiet.

The right side of your brain is all about creativity and flexibility.
Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way.
If you're right brained, you likely have a talent for creative writing and art.
Your right brain prefers day dreaming, philosophy, and sports.

Monday, March 07, 2005

You say she's just a friend...

This weekend I hung out with a lot of fellow Hokies and we had good times and interesting conversations. Of course you know when you get together in a large group of guys and girls interesting comments will start to fly.

I was telling everyone about plans I was making to hang out with some friends of mine. When I said the list of people who were going some of the guys said, "Hey aren't any guys going with you?" I said , "No it was gonna be a girls weekend." Then I said, "Well there are a couple of guys who could go with us because I don't really think of them as guys. They are just like having girl friends." Of course the guys got all upset when I said this. Now I know there is at least one girl out there who will agree with me when I say there are guys in most girls lives that we will only ever view as a platonic friend. And as far as I'm concerned they are asexual. Some of the guys nearly blew a fuse. They were all yelling at me saying I couldn't say that about guys.

When I got home I started thinking about it and I started reflecting back on all the times that a guy has STRESSED it to me how he only ever viewed me as a friend and would NEVER have any romantic interest in me. This generally didn't bother me as I had no romantic interest in them either. It did bother me if I did, but I managed to get over it. I know there are other girls out there who have had this happen to them as well. The guy never said I was asexual, but trust me I knew I was. The only difference was I actually SAID I thought of my guy friends as asexual. I know of 3 guys in that room who if I had challenged them and they were HONEST then they would say they viewed me as a platonic friend and would never be romantically interested in me. I have known those guys long enough to know this.

Knowing that none of those guys are the least bit interested in me besides friendship I can't help but wonder why they were all upset when I made my comments. I guess it was the other girls chipping in saying they had guy friends they viewed the same way. Now in all fairness I think it is important to be up front and honest with people about your feelings. Especially if you are a guy and girl and spend a lot of time with each other. I feel it is important to know where you stand. Because sometimes when you are innocently hanging out with someone, wanting only friendship, they might develop feelings for you and because your relationship isn't clearly defined as only friendship it could cause some serious problems. But it seems to me that it's cool for a guy to say hey this girl is only my friend to other people, stressing how he could never, ever ever be possibly interested in her because heaven forbid a girl he might be interested in think he would actually want to date his friend. On the other hand when I say that and say there is no way I would ever want to date my guy friend they get all huffy and say I'm hating on guys. Maybe it was just the guys I was hanging out with.

Or maybe it's just another example of me emasculating the men in my life. Right Mark? Well anyway have a good day and enjoy.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Tanika,
Please stop posting hurtful things that offend my masculinity on your blog. It is one thing to tell me that I'm asexual, it is another thing to talk about my asexuality to others. I am, after all, an LA native and I have an image to maintain. Thank you.

;-)

Tanika said...

Disgruntled Amphibian,

I apoligize for my comments that offended your masculinity. But since I do it all the time I'm sure you will get over it. Second your name wasn't one of the names that came up regarding guys I view as asexual. Would it make you feel better knowing I don't view you as asexual? Somehow I don't think so. :-P

Anonymous said...

I started writing a simple comment in then suddenly too much stuff was bouncing around my head so you just have to go to my blog to see what craziness you sparked in my mind.