In follow-up to my last post and also in response to an excellent blog Lauren posted I have been thinking a lot about some of the thoughts I've had concerning male/female relationships. Upon reflection I think I should apologize for the comment I made in my previous blog when I said that some of my guy friends are like girl friends. I guess I get so used to guys referring to me as "Just one of the guys." that I have adopted that phrase to refer to my guy friends as "Just one of the girls." I don't mind a guy feeling comfortable around me, but as Lauren stated I don't want him to forget I'm a woman. (i.e. scratching, and belching and being vulgar and disrespectful of women). I mean I still have confidence as a woman, but man does my ego take a beating. On the other hand when I refer to a guy with similar terms it can seem pretty harsh. I mean let's get real, no guy wants a woman to think of him in feminine terms.
But when I refer to a guy as just one of the girls I still regard him as a man. For example, I have a friend Mark, who I feel extremely comfortable with and would think of as just one of the girls. I usually go to him with questions concerning guys. Whether I just wanna bounce ideas or if I'm trying to figure out why guys are the way they are. The only difference between Mark and most other guys is that I feel comfortable enough with him that I know I can be open and honest and not have to stress about him thinking I'm interested in him or worrying about if he is just trying to get ...well you know.
I was talking to my friend Mary about the fact that I have a lot of guy friends and they usually confide in me about things. She was saying that with some guys they have girls they feel safe with. Girls they don't have to stress about romantic involvement with and can just be themselves around. Her husband Todd walked in as we were talking and agreed with her saying before he was married he had girl friends like that. So I feel that for my guy friends who think I'm a safe girl, I think of them as a safe guy. I also know that my safe guy friends don't get all freaked out if feminine issues come up. Like I don't get squeamish if guy issues come up. It's just life, deal with it!
My only real stress is when I'm interested in a guy and I don't wanna end up in the safe girl zone. Because once there it's hard to get out. Although there is always a possibility...Guys I know have definitely gone from safe guy zone to the ummm...we can't hang out with each other as much or it's gonna cause me some problems zone. HAHAHAHA! You know who you are.
Alas that's all I have to say about that. Have a good day and enjoy.
I am 50% Left Brain and 50% Right Brain. Interesting...
| You Are 50% Left Brained, 50% Right Brained |
 Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others. If you're left brained, you are likely good at math and logic. Your left brain prefers dogs, reading, and quiet. The right side of your brain is all about creativity and flexibility. Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way. If you're right brained, you likely have a talent for creative writing and art. Your right brain prefers day dreaming, philosophy, and sports. |
3 comments:
I wish there were an easy button for how to stay out of the "safe girl zone." I only manage to stay out of that zone when I DON'T WANT TO!!! Argh!!! But it's reassuring to know it's possible to move out of the zone, to think about that fab married couple we know where the wife went from safe girl to wife :)
I know. That is one of the things I think about when I think of guys who I know I'm a safe chick with. Then I remember it is possible to be liberated. ;)
Where I'm from, we call this the friend zone (or more specifically, getting stuck in the friend zone). It's a very common phenomenon, with no known reproducible cure.
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