I have been really enjoying reading recent posts by all my fellow bloggers. You should check some of them out they are over there on the right near the bottom. (yes, I know it's a lot of work to scroll down, get over it.)
I was reading a really interesting post by the wonderful, lovely Lauren about relationships both romantic and platonic. She was saying that sometimes the relationships that we "fall into easily" are actually the most difficult ones to maintain because we may not have taken the time to really get to know the person. She also did clarify saying that many relationships die away for various reasons not just because they were whirlwind. She blames the media in her post, which I'm always a huge advocate of doing.
I thought about what she meant and I know that in this instance that I think I have traumatized my other friends with relationships I've had with totally different people. For example, they will see me become really "good friends" with someone. Spend every waking moment with that person and then all of a sudden I'm not with that person any more. Not because they aren't cool, but because for me it was just a phase I was going through and it usually happens with people like I am.
(Before I tell this story I would like to clarify that I'm straight. And you could replace the name of Shannon with the name of certain guys I know and it would be the same) I call it "falling in love with people" I am very choosy about who I fall in love with, but when I do I can't be with them enough (to a point). For example when I first moved to LA I met this girl named Shannon. We were coworkers and some how or other I realized that she was into books and movies as much as I was and I found that our interests coincided on a lot of mutual subjects. We started spending pretty much every waking moment together. We worked together, ate together, went out together, and pretty much did everything together. I wanted to know everything about her and I was pretty much into learning everything about her. Then after a while I realized ok I'm done now, but she isn't that type of person. I had pretty much gotten over the first "crush" phase I have with people and realized that in order to maintain a friendship we had to do more than just read and eat together. We had to share and live our lives together. So to speak. Now we are good friends because we both realized that our relationship was worth working on and getting deeper.
I am 50% Left Brain and 50% Right Brain. Interesting...
| You Are 50% Left Brained, 50% Right Brained |
 Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others. If you're left brained, you are likely good at math and logic. Your left brain prefers dogs, reading, and quiet. The right side of your brain is all about creativity and flexibility. Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way. If you're right brained, you likely have a talent for creative writing and art. Your right brain prefers day dreaming, philosophy, and sports. |
Thursday, June 09, 2005
Wednesday, June 08, 2005
Your #1 Match: ISFJ |
| The Nurturer You have a strong need to belong, and you very loyal.A good listener, you excell at helping others in practical ways.In your spare time, you enjoy engaging your senses through art, cooking, and music.You find it easy to be devoted to one person, who you do special things for. You would make a good interior designer, chef, or child psychologist. |
Your #2 Match: ISTJ |
| The Duty Fulfiller You are responsible, reliable, and hardworking - you get the job done.You prefer productive hobbies, like woodworking or knittings.Quiet and serious, you are well prepared for whatever life hands you.Conservative and down-to-earth, you hardly ever do anything crazy. You would make a great business executive, accountant, or lawyer. |
Your #3 Match: INFJ |
| The Protector You live your life with integrity, originality, vision, and creativity.Independent and stubborn, you rarely stray from your vision - no matter what it is.You are an excellent listener, with almost infinite patience.You have complex, deep feelings, and you take great care to express them. You would make a great photographer, alternative medicine guru, or teacher. |
Your #4 Match: INTJ |
| The Scientist You have a head for ideas - and you are good at improving systems.Logical and strategic, you prefer for everything in your life to be organized.You tend to be a bit skeptical. You're both critical of yourself and of others.Independent and stubborn, you tend to only befriend those who are a lot like you. You would make an excellent scientist, engineer, or programmer. |
Your #5 Match: ESFJ |
| The Caregiver You are sympathetic and caring, putting friends and family first.A creature of habit, you prefer routines and have trouble with change.You love being in groups - whether you're helping people or working on a project.You are good at listening, laughing, and bringing out the best in people. You would make a great nurse, social worker, or teacher. |
Now that's interesting...
Throughout the year at Kairos we have been discussing groups both domestic and international that have been socially, economically or politically marginalized by their government or other governments. For the most part I think in hopes of raising awareness of what is actually going on in the world which sadly I feel most Americans are unaware of and also to see possible roles we can play in positively impacting these situations.
I read a really cool post by Donna about the role Amnesty International plays in raising awareness of human rights injustices around the globe. She points out that they have recently gotten some flack about their 2005 report because of some of their terminology which might have left something to be desired. But as she later stated maybe they could have had better word choice, but the fact of the matter is they are effective.
I guess this mainly jumped out at me because between talks at Kairos and Donna's post. I started realizing how insular my thinking about national/international injustices had become and how unaware I am of what is really happening in the world and thinking of ways I can effect change.
Ethnictoid(not quite black): I was riding in the car with my friend Christeen, who is german, yesterday and I was telling her a little anecdote from work that day about how this little boy and I were discussing how women of various ethnic groups express their displeasure in the younger generations. Then we moved on to stereotypes of groups in general and why they are the way they are. For example I was telling her that sometimes I feel that the large part of the black population can be excessively critical of other black people which I have mentioned in previous blactoids. This led to us talking about how I think most people feeling their ethnicity is part of their identity, but Christeen was saying that she feels that a lot of white people in this country don't. They just think of themselves as such and such who has these qualities. And speaking as a black person I know I feel like being black is very much so a part of my identity. I can only speak from my own perspective, but I could kinda see what she meant based on the conversations I've had with my friends of varying ethnicities. Please feel free to share your thoughts.
As always have a good day and enjoy.
I read a really cool post by Donna about the role Amnesty International plays in raising awareness of human rights injustices around the globe. She points out that they have recently gotten some flack about their 2005 report because of some of their terminology which might have left something to be desired. But as she later stated maybe they could have had better word choice, but the fact of the matter is they are effective.
I guess this mainly jumped out at me because between talks at Kairos and Donna's post. I started realizing how insular my thinking about national/international injustices had become and how unaware I am of what is really happening in the world and thinking of ways I can effect change.
Ethnictoid(not quite black): I was riding in the car with my friend Christeen, who is german, yesterday and I was telling her a little anecdote from work that day about how this little boy and I were discussing how women of various ethnic groups express their displeasure in the younger generations. Then we moved on to stereotypes of groups in general and why they are the way they are. For example I was telling her that sometimes I feel that the large part of the black population can be excessively critical of other black people which I have mentioned in previous blactoids. This led to us talking about how I think most people feeling their ethnicity is part of their identity, but Christeen was saying that she feels that a lot of white people in this country don't. They just think of themselves as such and such who has these qualities. And speaking as a black person I know I feel like being black is very much so a part of my identity. I can only speak from my own perspective, but I could kinda see what she meant based on the conversations I've had with my friends of varying ethnicities. Please feel free to share your thoughts.
As always have a good day and enjoy.
Monday, June 06, 2005
Deserve...
de·serve (d-zûrv) v. tr. To be worthy of; merit
"I deserve more than you can give me."
"I don't deserve to be treated this way!"
"You deserve a promotion after all the hard work you have done."
"I deserve to live without fear."
"I deserve a decent place to stay!"
"I deserve to be able to do whatever I want!"
"I deserve equal treatment and equal pay!"
"I deserve the right to live!"
"It sounded old. Deserve. Old, tired and beaten to death...he was always saying or thinking he didn't deserve some bad luck or some bad treatment from others...Apparently he thought he deserved only to be loved-from a distance, though-and given what he wanted....Maybe all he was really saying was: I am not responsible for your pain; share your happiness with me but not your unhappiness." -Milkman "Song of Solomon"
I think that sometimes it's easy to get confused between what we think we deserve and what we actually deserve. I've been reading Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison and as I near the end of it I watch the character Milkman and his views about how he thinks his life should be and what he deserves. Then I look at my life and think about what I THINK I deserve. In the things we truly deserve there is a truth and a rightness that can't be denied when it hasn't been attained. It's that same thing that keeps us trying. And then I realize where the real cause of my frustration comes from. It isn't from not getting what I actually deserve. It's about not getting the things I think I deserve. When I look deep into my reasons and my logic I realize how unjustified they are, how selfish they can be, and how they can consume my thoughts with their superficiality, I'm sometimes shocked. Then when I do get something I don't deserve how I can be sooo self-righteous, like it should have been mine in the first place completely missing the fact that is was a gift and unearned and unmeritted.
What do you deserve?
Tanika's Relationship Tip#11: Suprising the other person with thoughtfulness. In any relationship (friendship or romantic) sometimes it's easy to get bogged (*small chuckle* sorry Daniel) down with the mundane things of everyday life. That's why I think it's important to think about the little things that make the other person happy and when possible and within reason, surprising your significant other with small acts of kindness that bring joy to them and to you. Like opening the door to the UPS man and getting a package and not realizing it's for you because it isn't your birthday yet and it's not Christmas and opening and seeing one of your most favoritest things in the whole wide world inside. I guess it's really about thinking about the other person and not just focusing on what yourself and what you can get out of the relationship, but how you can appreciate the other person. Or instead of going to KFC and saying "I'm sure you'll find something you can eat." knowing they are a vegetarian you could try that new Vegan restaurant up the street (As long as it wouldn't annoy you or anything, and even if it does get over it). And whatever it is should be something that feels natural and comfortable to you as well otherwise it will seem like some sort of chore and it really isn't because it's you just trying to make some else feel better and at the same time nuture the relationship you have together.
Toodles for now and as always have a good day and enjoy.
"I deserve more than you can give me."
"I don't deserve to be treated this way!"
"You deserve a promotion after all the hard work you have done."
"I deserve to live without fear."
"I deserve a decent place to stay!"
"I deserve to be able to do whatever I want!"
"I deserve equal treatment and equal pay!"
"I deserve the right to live!"
"It sounded old. Deserve. Old, tired and beaten to death...he was always saying or thinking he didn't deserve some bad luck or some bad treatment from others...Apparently he thought he deserved only to be loved-from a distance, though-and given what he wanted....Maybe all he was really saying was: I am not responsible for your pain; share your happiness with me but not your unhappiness." -Milkman "Song of Solomon"
I think that sometimes it's easy to get confused between what we think we deserve and what we actually deserve. I've been reading Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison and as I near the end of it I watch the character Milkman and his views about how he thinks his life should be and what he deserves. Then I look at my life and think about what I THINK I deserve. In the things we truly deserve there is a truth and a rightness that can't be denied when it hasn't been attained. It's that same thing that keeps us trying. And then I realize where the real cause of my frustration comes from. It isn't from not getting what I actually deserve. It's about not getting the things I think I deserve. When I look deep into my reasons and my logic I realize how unjustified they are, how selfish they can be, and how they can consume my thoughts with their superficiality, I'm sometimes shocked. Then when I do get something I don't deserve how I can be sooo self-righteous, like it should have been mine in the first place completely missing the fact that is was a gift and unearned and unmeritted.
What do you deserve?
Tanika's Relationship Tip#11: Suprising the other person with thoughtfulness. In any relationship (friendship or romantic) sometimes it's easy to get bogged (*small chuckle* sorry Daniel) down with the mundane things of everyday life. That's why I think it's important to think about the little things that make the other person happy and when possible and within reason, surprising your significant other with small acts of kindness that bring joy to them and to you. Like opening the door to the UPS man and getting a package and not realizing it's for you because it isn't your birthday yet and it's not Christmas and opening and seeing one of your most favoritest things in the whole wide world inside. I guess it's really about thinking about the other person and not just focusing on what yourself and what you can get out of the relationship, but how you can appreciate the other person. Or instead of going to KFC and saying "I'm sure you'll find something you can eat." knowing they are a vegetarian you could try that new Vegan restaurant up the street (As long as it wouldn't annoy you or anything, and even if it does get over it). And whatever it is should be something that feels natural and comfortable to you as well otherwise it will seem like some sort of chore and it really isn't because it's you just trying to make some else feel better and at the same time nuture the relationship you have together.
Toodles for now and as always have a good day and enjoy.
Friday, June 03, 2005
Cowboy Troy and Other Atrocities
The other day my friend Fred (change the name to protect the guilty) asked me if I had heard of this new guy on the scene Cowboy Troy. I guess he mixes hip-hop/rap with country music. Fred says "Hick-hop" will be the new craze. Somehow I doubt it. It's almost scary really. You should check out his "I play chicken with the train" video. It's so scary it's unreal. It's like this weird amalgamation of a typical black man's video and a country video (and yes there are midgets!)
Moving on, my good friend Brooke posted a wonderful entry that I absolutely loved and that leads me to something that has been pressing on my mind over the past couple of weeks as L.A. moves into another blazingly hot summer. As the temperatures rise people seek ways to "Beat the Heat". Whether it's losing the shirt for guys, or wearing skimpy clothes for the ladies, people will do anything to try to stay cool in this weather or enjoy it whatever the case may be, even if it isnt' socially acceptable.
As I have travelled to various parts of the city I have been accosted (visually at least) by many a faux pas as a result of people not knowing how to appropriately enjoy the weather. So here I have compiled yet again another list of LA do's and dont's (The Summer Edition) :
(Most important rule in my african american opinion)
Do: Get out there, go to the beach and get some sun wearing the appropriate level of spf. (Nothing wrong with that)
Don't: Walk around looking like THE red lobster after you told your worried african american friend a trite phrase like "I don't burn" or "All my burn turns to tan" We can't take it.
Do: (Ladies and Gents) Wear summer appropriate footwear that help keep you cool and (ladies) show off that cute pedicure.
Don't: Wear sandals or flip flops if your feet are so jacked up it looks like your toes are throwing gang signs. (exception old people with arthritis; and I'm gonna need a note)
Do: Wear clothes that are cool and comfortable for your SIZE and BODY type. (Hey just because you a little thick doesn't been you can't stay cool)
Don't: Wear belly shirts if you KNOW you shouldn't be, (goodness) walking around threatening indecent exposure charges. Or wear a spousal corrector (you know what I mean) tee-shirt if you weigh less than 100 pounds. Just not gonna work. And remember bermuda shorts and pedal pushers are making a comeback and for better or worse so are culottes (eww!)
That's all I have for now. Please feel free to contribute your personal opinions. And remember in LA fashion knows no temperature.
Tanika's Relationsship Tip #10: In keeping with atrocities I guess my tip should deal with that right? A friend of mine told me this past week that it's important to communicate with the person you are dating or married to. She is recently engaged and we were having a discussion about being open and communicating with your significant other. I told her that sometimes I don't feel like talking and that I would be better off with someone like me. But the truth is I don't like that about me. I want to be able to talk and share with the person that I will spend my life with. If I can't then how can I expect the relationship to work? It goes back to the tip I gave about being true to who you are. Because if you aren't then your whole relationship is built on a lie and ultimately won't work. Being open with the person I'm with is the only way they can truly get to know me and it's the only real way to stay true to myself and vice versa. My friend Daniel made a comment about marriage being the most intimate relationship two people can have. And in the hope that the relationship you are in is moving in that direction it makes sense that you want to nuture your relationship so that it will be strong and functioning. I always think when I meet the right person I'll be able to be open and honest and communicate freely with them, but the truth is that if I find that impossible to do now there is no way I will be able to to it when it really matters. The real atrocity would be to keep yourself hidden or closed off from the person that you are in a relationshipo with.
Moving on, my good friend Brooke posted a wonderful entry that I absolutely loved and that leads me to something that has been pressing on my mind over the past couple of weeks as L.A. moves into another blazingly hot summer. As the temperatures rise people seek ways to "Beat the Heat". Whether it's losing the shirt for guys, or wearing skimpy clothes for the ladies, people will do anything to try to stay cool in this weather or enjoy it whatever the case may be, even if it isnt' socially acceptable.
As I have travelled to various parts of the city I have been accosted (visually at least) by many a faux pas as a result of people not knowing how to appropriately enjoy the weather. So here I have compiled yet again another list of LA do's and dont's (The Summer Edition) :
(Most important rule in my african american opinion)
Do: Get out there, go to the beach and get some sun wearing the appropriate level of spf. (Nothing wrong with that)
Don't: Walk around looking like THE red lobster after you told your worried african american friend a trite phrase like "I don't burn" or "All my burn turns to tan" We can't take it.
Do: (Ladies and Gents) Wear summer appropriate footwear that help keep you cool and (ladies) show off that cute pedicure.
Don't: Wear sandals or flip flops if your feet are so jacked up it looks like your toes are throwing gang signs. (exception old people with arthritis; and I'm gonna need a note)
Do: Wear clothes that are cool and comfortable for your SIZE and BODY type. (Hey just because you a little thick doesn't been you can't stay cool)
Don't: Wear belly shirts if you KNOW you shouldn't be, (goodness) walking around threatening indecent exposure charges. Or wear a spousal corrector (you know what I mean) tee-shirt if you weigh less than 100 pounds. Just not gonna work. And remember bermuda shorts and pedal pushers are making a comeback and for better or worse so are culottes (eww!)
That's all I have for now. Please feel free to contribute your personal opinions. And remember in LA fashion knows no temperature.
Tanika's Relationsship Tip #10: In keeping with atrocities I guess my tip should deal with that right? A friend of mine told me this past week that it's important to communicate with the person you are dating or married to. She is recently engaged and we were having a discussion about being open and communicating with your significant other. I told her that sometimes I don't feel like talking and that I would be better off with someone like me. But the truth is I don't like that about me. I want to be able to talk and share with the person that I will spend my life with. If I can't then how can I expect the relationship to work? It goes back to the tip I gave about being true to who you are. Because if you aren't then your whole relationship is built on a lie and ultimately won't work. Being open with the person I'm with is the only way they can truly get to know me and it's the only real way to stay true to myself and vice versa. My friend Daniel made a comment about marriage being the most intimate relationship two people can have. And in the hope that the relationship you are in is moving in that direction it makes sense that you want to nuture your relationship so that it will be strong and functioning. I always think when I meet the right person I'll be able to be open and honest and communicate freely with them, but the truth is that if I find that impossible to do now there is no way I will be able to to it when it really matters. The real atrocity would be to keep yourself hidden or closed off from the person that you are in a relationshipo with.
Wednesday, June 01, 2005
Shaw's take on things
I have to admit that I don't enjoy watching most of the shows that come on television these days, although there are some exceptions. None of them, however, are aired on the WB especially shows like Gilmore Girls or Beauty and the Geek. But Sunday I found myself watching the season finale of One Tree Hill (a good friend of mine watches it so...) Anyway I was watching the show and I don't know much about the characters but they had to write and end of the year paper about their opinion of a quote by George Bernard Shaw.
"There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart's desire. The other is to gain it."
I sorta got stuck thinking about this quote and not really focusing on the show. (Sorry person who I was watching the show with). But I did keep a small eye on what various people were saying. One character referred to Shaw as a punk. Another said he didn't know what he was talking about. Most of them agreed with the first part of his statement. That a tragedy of life is to lose your heart' desire and they elaborated on what THAT really meant. But it seemed to be pretty uniform that it can't possibly be a tragedy to gain your heart's desire no matter what.
But as Anna pointed out in a comment to my last post. Sometimes what a heart desire's might not be the best thing for us. I'm currently reading Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison and one of the characters Hagar is in love with her cousin Milkman and has been dating him for the past 12 years. Suddenly Milkman realizes he doesn't want to be with her. She is tramatized by this and realizes that if she can't live in this world with Milkman then she would rather kill him than see him with anyone else. So once a month she stalks him and tries to kill him. But the truth of the matter is that throughout the course of there relationship Milkman has just been using her anyway. He doesn't love or care about her. So the irony of it all is that what she wants most in this world doesn't want her and is definitely not good for her.
I thought about this and realized that sometimes I can be a lot like Hagar. I'll get what I thought I always wanted, but in reality it will be tearing me apart inside and out. Then I will be devastated when I can't have it anymore when in reality I never should have had it in the first place. Feel free to share your thoughts on this subject.
Blactoid: A quote found before the beginning of Song of Solomon is "The fathers may soar and the children may know their names". This is one of my favorite quotes. Not just because it sounds good but because of it's deeper meaning. Morrison traces back to the flying myth of black men. She is referring to our forefathers who flew from slavery. A lot of blacks after slavery ended had to register themselves with the government. Most couldn't read or write. So a lot of family names were lost and they were forced to keep names given to them by slave owners. Some people felt this naming kept them further in bondage. I think that when they were able to name themselves and give identity to both themselves and their children it was a liberating experience and the children would be aware of where they came from.
Anyhoo as always have a good day and as always enjoy.
"There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart's desire. The other is to gain it."
I sorta got stuck thinking about this quote and not really focusing on the show. (Sorry person who I was watching the show with). But I did keep a small eye on what various people were saying. One character referred to Shaw as a punk. Another said he didn't know what he was talking about. Most of them agreed with the first part of his statement. That a tragedy of life is to lose your heart' desire and they elaborated on what THAT really meant. But it seemed to be pretty uniform that it can't possibly be a tragedy to gain your heart's desire no matter what.
But as Anna pointed out in a comment to my last post. Sometimes what a heart desire's might not be the best thing for us. I'm currently reading Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison and one of the characters Hagar is in love with her cousin Milkman and has been dating him for the past 12 years. Suddenly Milkman realizes he doesn't want to be with her. She is tramatized by this and realizes that if she can't live in this world with Milkman then she would rather kill him than see him with anyone else. So once a month she stalks him and tries to kill him. But the truth of the matter is that throughout the course of there relationship Milkman has just been using her anyway. He doesn't love or care about her. So the irony of it all is that what she wants most in this world doesn't want her and is definitely not good for her.
I thought about this and realized that sometimes I can be a lot like Hagar. I'll get what I thought I always wanted, but in reality it will be tearing me apart inside and out. Then I will be devastated when I can't have it anymore when in reality I never should have had it in the first place. Feel free to share your thoughts on this subject.
Blactoid: A quote found before the beginning of Song of Solomon is "The fathers may soar and the children may know their names". This is one of my favorite quotes. Not just because it sounds good but because of it's deeper meaning. Morrison traces back to the flying myth of black men. She is referring to our forefathers who flew from slavery. A lot of blacks after slavery ended had to register themselves with the government. Most couldn't read or write. So a lot of family names were lost and they were forced to keep names given to them by slave owners. Some people felt this naming kept them further in bondage. I think that when they were able to name themselves and give identity to both themselves and their children it was a liberating experience and the children would be aware of where they came from.
Anyhoo as always have a good day and as always enjoy.
Tuesday, May 31, 2005
Unrealistic Expectations
You know I've always thought of myself as someone who has realistic expectations in events and people. I try not to get my hopes up all high so I won't get disappointed. As a matter of fact I underexpect most of the time. Not sure if it's just a defense mechanism or a life of disappointing events and conditioning, but still...
And even being the realistic optimist I prefer to believe I am I feel crushed by the weight of my own desires and dreams unfulfilled. *sigh* Goodness this isn't very Tanika-esque is it. But anyway just wanted to vent for a bit before I head off to work. Everyone have a good day as always and enjoy.
And even being the realistic optimist I prefer to believe I am I feel crushed by the weight of my own desires and dreams unfulfilled. *sigh* Goodness this isn't very Tanika-esque is it. But anyway just wanted to vent for a bit before I head off to work. Everyone have a good day as always and enjoy.
Sunday, May 29, 2005
Maybe she should be writing the tips...
I just read a really wonderful post by my friend Anna that you should check out. In it she touches on some extremely superficial and trivial things that people focus on when trying to date someone else. As a person who has encountered these things I agree wholeheartedly with her. I have definitely had some guys let me know that because of my race or my religion we couldn't date. And I realized that if they really wanted to be with me then that wouldn't matter and that they cleary weren't and waiting for them to change their mind is a pointless exercise.
Because I have been interested in and dated guys of various ethnicities and religions a major area of stress for me can be whether or not he is going to me like no sorry Tanika I don't date black girls. Then I realize that if that is how they are I really shouldn't be getting hung up over them because they aren't who I want anyway, but in the beginning it's hard to be like because I'm already and emotional wreck and I shouldn't have to stress out about that as well as everything else.
This weekend I've been hanging out with some friends visiting from out of town, Lauren and Becca. And I was telling them that for some reason I get hit on a lot by Armenian and Russian guys. Which is totally fine by me. As long as they aren't pervs or anything. Well I was telling them about a couple of Armenian guys I know who only date black women. I told them that unfortunately these guys aren't going to marry these girls because it just isn't acceptable in their families. Basically they are going to marry Armenian women because it is what is expected. I feel like that is just as bad as saying hey I refuse to date someone if they aren't this race or that religion. Anyway just wanted to give my two cents on the subject, but Anna does it better.
As always have a good day and enjoy.
Because I have been interested in and dated guys of various ethnicities and religions a major area of stress for me can be whether or not he is going to me like no sorry Tanika I don't date black girls. Then I realize that if that is how they are I really shouldn't be getting hung up over them because they aren't who I want anyway, but in the beginning it's hard to be like because I'm already and emotional wreck and I shouldn't have to stress out about that as well as everything else.
This weekend I've been hanging out with some friends visiting from out of town, Lauren and Becca. And I was telling them that for some reason I get hit on a lot by Armenian and Russian guys. Which is totally fine by me. As long as they aren't pervs or anything. Well I was telling them about a couple of Armenian guys I know who only date black women. I told them that unfortunately these guys aren't going to marry these girls because it just isn't acceptable in their families. Basically they are going to marry Armenian women because it is what is expected. I feel like that is just as bad as saying hey I refuse to date someone if they aren't this race or that religion. Anyway just wanted to give my two cents on the subject, but Anna does it better.
As always have a good day and enjoy.
Monday, May 23, 2005
It's a Celebration...
That's right! Today actaully about 26 years and 2 hours ago technically because I was born in chicago, the world was graced with my presence for the first time. But that's ok becuase, "It's a Celebration..." -Dave Chappelle as Rick James (this link is PG-13 please look at it with extreme caution).
I wanted to write something witty and funny on my birthday, but I can't think of anything. Generally speaking whenever I'm trying to be serious everyone thinks I'm being funny, but when I'm trying to be funny no one ever gets it. I think it's because what I think is funny and what other people think is funny only coincide 1/3 of the time. But anyway happy birthday to all the people out there with the fortune to celebrate this wonderful day with me.
Btw-the Chappelle Show Season 2 comes out on DVD tomorrow and it wouldn't go amiss as a birthday gift. Just thought I'd toss that out there.
I had a really good weekend. I saw Crash on Saturday(loved it!) and I will be writing a review just not today. Later that evening I had a dessert party I think Lisa took pictures. Then yesterday I went to Beni Hana's with my friend and we ate until you had to roll us out of there. Then I got my first taste of mild publicity in LA. I was on channel 4 news (local nbc) commenting on the how hot it was as I roasted in the Valley. All in all a very cool weekend. Left me with the exhaustion, but that was ok. Today it's back to work as usual with a few special treats here and there.
Have a good day and as always enjoy.
I wanted to write something witty and funny on my birthday, but I can't think of anything. Generally speaking whenever I'm trying to be serious everyone thinks I'm being funny, but when I'm trying to be funny no one ever gets it. I think it's because what I think is funny and what other people think is funny only coincide 1/3 of the time. But anyway happy birthday to all the people out there with the fortune to celebrate this wonderful day with me.
Btw-the Chappelle Show Season 2 comes out on DVD tomorrow and it wouldn't go amiss as a birthday gift. Just thought I'd toss that out there.
I had a really good weekend. I saw Crash on Saturday(loved it!) and I will be writing a review just not today. Later that evening I had a dessert party I think Lisa took pictures. Then yesterday I went to Beni Hana's with my friend and we ate until you had to roll us out of there. Then I got my first taste of mild publicity in LA. I was on channel 4 news (local nbc) commenting on the how hot it was as I roasted in the Valley. All in all a very cool weekend. Left me with the exhaustion, but that was ok. Today it's back to work as usual with a few special treats here and there.
Have a good day and as always enjoy.
Friday, May 20, 2005
A Taboo Topic (for me anyway)
I was contemplating the mystery that is Tanika these past two days concerning a particular area of my life. And I realized a few (good/bad) things about myself. (Besides the things that are glaringly obvious)
I live with my good friends the Raceks and they have 3 cool kids Dawson, Katie, and B. Will. I also work with children at the Mathnasium and also as a private tutor. Needless to say I spend about 90% of my time with children. Besides being incredibly interesting and fun to be around children ,in general, are physically affectionate. And they definately don't understand physical boundaries or personal space.
For those of you who know me this is a particularly sensitive subject because I'm not a touchy, feely person. There are reasons for this, which I will discuss here briefly. First, when I was younger I had my personal space physically violated by someone else and I had no control over this, which both angered me, frustrated me, and ultimately left me not wanting a lot of personal contact. Then in some of my earlier attempts to physically reach out to people (of the opposite sex) I again had a violation of that space. As I got older I realized that I really needed to trust a person to be physically close to them (regardless of their sex). But alas trust is an area of life that doesn't come easy to me. Then when I would try to explain myself to people some would think I was joking and overstep boundaries I had, which basically traumatized me.
But children don't understand all that, nor do I expect them to. I also feel that it is important for children to be able to express themselves emotionally since it is very difficult for them to do it verbally. So over the course of these past few months I've been getting a lot of hugs, kisses, and general affection , from children and sometimes adults, which at first seemed overwhelming, but now I'm getting used to and I also realized that in some cases I actually enjoy. Yes, there I said it. I enjoy SOME hugs. I realized that kids just like adults have reasons for expressing affection. When they like someonesometimes they want to give you a hug, or a kiss on the cheek. Maybe even play with your hair. But sometimes they want to manipulate you emotionally so they can get something they want. I found this out mostly at the mathnasium with older children. They would give me hugs and wanna hang all over me (which I don't let them do. Mathnasium policy) then turn around and say "Hey can I get a dollar?"
I guess ultimately I feel uncomfortable with physical affection from people who either clearly are self motivated and don't have my best interests at heart, are trying manipulate me, or have unclear motives for why they are being that way (or I just don't trust them). But I realized that when a person just genuinely likes me and wants to physically express it then I actually want to return that affection. Now don't get me wrong I still need time to get used to it, but before everyone was just lumped together in my mind and I just didn't want anyone to touch me at all. I mostly just tolerated it.
But the irony of it all is that somewhere in the back of my mind I'm doubting that a person atually has genuine affection for me, which is why I get all weirded out in the first place. How's that for a twisted thread? Anyway just wanted to share.
As always have a good day and enjoy.
I live with my good friends the Raceks and they have 3 cool kids Dawson, Katie, and B. Will. I also work with children at the Mathnasium and also as a private tutor. Needless to say I spend about 90% of my time with children. Besides being incredibly interesting and fun to be around children ,in general, are physically affectionate. And they definately don't understand physical boundaries or personal space.
For those of you who know me this is a particularly sensitive subject because I'm not a touchy, feely person. There are reasons for this, which I will discuss here briefly. First, when I was younger I had my personal space physically violated by someone else and I had no control over this, which both angered me, frustrated me, and ultimately left me not wanting a lot of personal contact. Then in some of my earlier attempts to physically reach out to people (of the opposite sex) I again had a violation of that space. As I got older I realized that I really needed to trust a person to be physically close to them (regardless of their sex). But alas trust is an area of life that doesn't come easy to me. Then when I would try to explain myself to people some would think I was joking and overstep boundaries I had, which basically traumatized me.
But children don't understand all that, nor do I expect them to. I also feel that it is important for children to be able to express themselves emotionally since it is very difficult for them to do it verbally. So over the course of these past few months I've been getting a lot of hugs, kisses, and general affection , from children and sometimes adults, which at first seemed overwhelming, but now I'm getting used to and I also realized that in some cases I actually enjoy. Yes, there I said it. I enjoy SOME hugs. I realized that kids just like adults have reasons for expressing affection. When they like someonesometimes they want to give you a hug, or a kiss on the cheek. Maybe even play with your hair. But sometimes they want to manipulate you emotionally so they can get something they want. I found this out mostly at the mathnasium with older children. They would give me hugs and wanna hang all over me (which I don't let them do. Mathnasium policy) then turn around and say "Hey can I get a dollar?"
I guess ultimately I feel uncomfortable with physical affection from people who either clearly are self motivated and don't have my best interests at heart, are trying manipulate me, or have unclear motives for why they are being that way (or I just don't trust them). But I realized that when a person just genuinely likes me and wants to physically express it then I actually want to return that affection. Now don't get me wrong I still need time to get used to it, but before everyone was just lumped together in my mind and I just didn't want anyone to touch me at all. I mostly just tolerated it.
But the irony of it all is that somewhere in the back of my mind I'm doubting that a person atually has genuine affection for me, which is why I get all weirded out in the first place. How's that for a twisted thread? Anyway just wanted to share.
As always have a good day and enjoy.
Thursday, May 19, 2005
Confessions...
I have a confession I feel compelled to make, but I don't want too many people know what I did unless they really want to know.
Recemment, j'ai trouve que je peux voir le IP address, recherche, et reference de la page de les gens qui visitent mon blog. Depuis lors, je suis hante avec trouver qui visiter mon blog. Hier soir, j'etais eveiller jusque a 11:30 recherche l'internet pour les gens. Recherche blogs et homepages. Bien sur, il est tres pathetique. Peut etre, je suis un blog stalker. Je ne sais pas. J'ai besoin d'aide.
Comme toujours ayez une bonne journee et appreciez.
Recemment, j'ai trouve que je peux voir le IP address, recherche, et reference de la page de les gens qui visitent mon blog. Depuis lors, je suis hante avec trouver qui visiter mon blog. Hier soir, j'etais eveiller jusque a 11:30 recherche l'internet pour les gens. Recherche blogs et homepages. Bien sur, il est tres pathetique. Peut etre, je suis un blog stalker. Je ne sais pas. J'ai besoin d'aide.
Comme toujours ayez une bonne journee et appreciez.
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
Tanika's Relationship Tip #9
Back by popular demand (i.e. one person asked what happened to my relationship tips), here is my next hot relationship tip (sarcasm). Pretty simple, pretty basic.
In a place like the United States where individualism is highly regarded you would THINK that this wouldn't be a problem, but upon closer inspection and reflection I have noticed this to be the case for a number of couples. Closely tied to my previous tip, #9 is not trying to change who you are, your personality or behavior, into something that isn't true to your beliefs or values in order to have or continue a romantic relationship. (or friendship)
Now don't get me wrong there are a few things I'm not trying to say here. First I'm not saying that if you are in a relationship with someone and you don't see "eye to eye" on a subject that you shouldn't work out something that is mutually beneficial because ideally that is what you want to do. I'm also not saying that if you realize that you and your partner don't have the same goals in life everything is automatically over. But if you aren't dating that person yet then maybe you should take some time to be friends with them get to know them a little better and then see if that person really is the right one for you. Or if you are already in a relationship maybe it would be a good time for you to reassess your priorities, because maybe it isn't as much of an issue as it once was. I'm also not saying you should be so strong and stubborn that if something is important to you that you should cling to it so tightly that you might ruin a wonderful relationship, but try to keep proper perspective on what is important to both you and your partner. Now after all that what AM I saying....
I'm saying that if you change who you represent yourself to be from what you are essentially, trying to be someone you aren't so that people will be interested in you, then it's only a matter of time until the real you, the regular old you starts slipping through the cracks. Shocking and sometimes traumatizing the person you are interested in. I guess I see a lot of people who try to make a better NEW and IMPROVED version of themselves that they present to other people because they feel that who they really are isn't good enough to love or be appreciated. Or maybe the way they desire to be loved and appreciated. I admit that my "interests" have varied depending on who I was interested in. But it was only a matter of time before I had to admit that Backgammon really isn't that interesting to me. I only like getting dressed up once in a while, not acting like I have an endless supply of "cute" clothes (which in actual fact I borrow from my friends). And although I enjoy dancing, I hate clubbing. I really enjoy having a glass of wine or a cocktail, but I really can't stand getting drunk out of my mind to "have a good time". But these are all things that I have done (except the backgammon) in order to try and maintain a relationship, but ultimately Tanika came back up and was like this isn't me and I'm not happy.
But let's get real. Most of us want to change those character flaws we THINK other people see in us in hopes that it will make us more likeable. Just recently a guy friend of mine asked me to be honest with him and tell him what things about him are undesirable characteristics. I guess he wanted to work on them or something. And in all honesty I couldn't tell him because I like him the way he is, as a matter of fact the more I learn about him the more his estimation goes up in MY eyes. (THAT'S RIGHT I KNOW YOU ARE READING THIS SO THERE! And no this isn't an internet proposition.) Maybe he is a little rough around the edges, but after hanging out with some girlfriends a couple of weeks ago I found out just like me, they like guys who are rough around the edges, you know not quite smooth. To that guy I say, "Hey you're ok with me don't change a thing, and quit trippin'." But I'm not every girl and neither are my friends so you should probably ask the girl your interested in. And for the record all the guys I have liked have been rough around the edges. It was the quirky bits that made me more interested in them. I would like to state for the record that there isn't anything wrong with trying to make yourself a better person, but check your reasons because if they are really superficial it will get to you after a while. It's a difficult process figuring out who you are and your identity and what is important to you and what actually makes you happy. Don't throw that out the window for something that probably won't last anyway because it's based on the lie that you are someone you really aren't.
I hope this tip was helpful. Like I always say this is not a formula or something we always need to take each relationship as the individual thing it is and try to figure out what is best for your and your partner. As always have a good day and enjoy.
In a place like the United States where individualism is highly regarded you would THINK that this wouldn't be a problem, but upon closer inspection and reflection I have noticed this to be the case for a number of couples. Closely tied to my previous tip, #9 is not trying to change who you are, your personality or behavior, into something that isn't true to your beliefs or values in order to have or continue a romantic relationship. (or friendship)
Now don't get me wrong there are a few things I'm not trying to say here. First I'm not saying that if you are in a relationship with someone and you don't see "eye to eye" on a subject that you shouldn't work out something that is mutually beneficial because ideally that is what you want to do. I'm also not saying that if you realize that you and your partner don't have the same goals in life everything is automatically over. But if you aren't dating that person yet then maybe you should take some time to be friends with them get to know them a little better and then see if that person really is the right one for you. Or if you are already in a relationship maybe it would be a good time for you to reassess your priorities, because maybe it isn't as much of an issue as it once was. I'm also not saying you should be so strong and stubborn that if something is important to you that you should cling to it so tightly that you might ruin a wonderful relationship, but try to keep proper perspective on what is important to both you and your partner. Now after all that what AM I saying....
I'm saying that if you change who you represent yourself to be from what you are essentially, trying to be someone you aren't so that people will be interested in you, then it's only a matter of time until the real you, the regular old you starts slipping through the cracks. Shocking and sometimes traumatizing the person you are interested in. I guess I see a lot of people who try to make a better NEW and IMPROVED version of themselves that they present to other people because they feel that who they really are isn't good enough to love or be appreciated. Or maybe the way they desire to be loved and appreciated. I admit that my "interests" have varied depending on who I was interested in. But it was only a matter of time before I had to admit that Backgammon really isn't that interesting to me. I only like getting dressed up once in a while, not acting like I have an endless supply of "cute" clothes (which in actual fact I borrow from my friends). And although I enjoy dancing, I hate clubbing. I really enjoy having a glass of wine or a cocktail, but I really can't stand getting drunk out of my mind to "have a good time". But these are all things that I have done (except the backgammon) in order to try and maintain a relationship, but ultimately Tanika came back up and was like this isn't me and I'm not happy.
But let's get real. Most of us want to change those character flaws we THINK other people see in us in hopes that it will make us more likeable. Just recently a guy friend of mine asked me to be honest with him and tell him what things about him are undesirable characteristics. I guess he wanted to work on them or something. And in all honesty I couldn't tell him because I like him the way he is, as a matter of fact the more I learn about him the more his estimation goes up in MY eyes. (THAT'S RIGHT I KNOW YOU ARE READING THIS SO THERE! And no this isn't an internet proposition.) Maybe he is a little rough around the edges, but after hanging out with some girlfriends a couple of weeks ago I found out just like me, they like guys who are rough around the edges, you know not quite smooth. To that guy I say, "Hey you're ok with me don't change a thing, and quit trippin'." But I'm not every girl and neither are my friends so you should probably ask the girl your interested in. And for the record all the guys I have liked have been rough around the edges. It was the quirky bits that made me more interested in them. I would like to state for the record that there isn't anything wrong with trying to make yourself a better person, but check your reasons because if they are really superficial it will get to you after a while. It's a difficult process figuring out who you are and your identity and what is important to you and what actually makes you happy. Don't throw that out the window for something that probably won't last anyway because it's based on the lie that you are someone you really aren't.
I hope this tip was helpful. Like I always say this is not a formula or something we always need to take each relationship as the individual thing it is and try to figure out what is best for your and your partner. As always have a good day and enjoy.
Saturday, May 14, 2005
Hate it or Love it
Ugh!!!...the bad music monster strikes again. Like most of you out there I'm sure you have songs that you can't stand, but for some reason those are the songs you know all the lyrics to. As a connoisseur of fine music I like to believe that I enjoy music because it's creative or original or has some redeeming quality besides the fact that it's popular. Then another catchy song comes along and knocks me off my high horse.
Like a year or so ago Twista, Kanye, and Jamie Foxx got me with "Slow Jamz" It wasn't because of the sample from a song I like, or the catchy hook. It was that line that goes, "She gotta light skinned friend look like Micheal Jackson, She gotta dark skinned friend look like Micheal Jackson". Torturers! Then Li'l Jon got me twice with that stupid "Get Low" song which is absolutely horrible, but "From the window to the wall!" got me. I guess I can't blame him from getting me with Usher and Ludacris because Usher does have talent so I'll excuse "Yeah" and "Lovers and Friends".
But the most recent catastrophe involves 50 Cent who I vowed I would never deliberately listen to. I was over at a friends place a couple of weeks ago and one of the guys brought the new "The Game" cd and played it for us. The song is by The Game featuring 50 Cent. And the way 50 cent mumbles in the chorus you sit there trying to figure out what he said, "Mmmm mmm hmmmm mmm mmm hmmm on top, mmmm hmmmm mmmmm heart stop" I mean it was torture. Then I was listening to Yahoo music launch and it came again and of course I listened to it a couple of times going what is he saying. Unfortunately by the time I realized I could just look up the lyrics it was too late. Hate it or Love it. (check out the video see if you love it or hate it)
Have a good day and as always enjoy.
Like a year or so ago Twista, Kanye, and Jamie Foxx got me with "Slow Jamz" It wasn't because of the sample from a song I like, or the catchy hook. It was that line that goes, "She gotta light skinned friend look like Micheal Jackson, She gotta dark skinned friend look like Micheal Jackson". Torturers! Then Li'l Jon got me twice with that stupid "Get Low" song which is absolutely horrible, but "From the window to the wall!" got me. I guess I can't blame him from getting me with Usher and Ludacris because Usher does have talent so I'll excuse "Yeah" and "Lovers and Friends".
But the most recent catastrophe involves 50 Cent who I vowed I would never deliberately listen to. I was over at a friends place a couple of weeks ago and one of the guys brought the new "The Game" cd and played it for us. The song is by The Game featuring 50 Cent. And the way 50 cent mumbles in the chorus you sit there trying to figure out what he said, "Mmmm mmm hmmmm mmm mmm hmmm on top, mmmm hmmmm mmmmm heart stop" I mean it was torture. Then I was listening to Yahoo music launch and it came again and of course I listened to it a couple of times going what is he saying. Unfortunately by the time I realized I could just look up the lyrics it was too late. Hate it or Love it. (check out the video see if you love it or hate it)
Have a good day and as always enjoy.
Thursday, May 12, 2005
Vegas Stories and Some Pictures...
O.k. on to Vegas post #2. I posted some pictures on my other site (graciously provided by Mimi). So if you want to see some wild crazy fun check it out (sarcasm).
Now I would like to share with you some of my favorite Vegas Stories / Moments:
The Bus:
Now as most of you know I don't have a car so I bus it a lot. And I have a policy that if the bus goes there then so do I, but I do have limits. Apparently Vegas isn't one of them. Although there were several alternatives I made my way (slowly) to Vegas on the Greyhound bus. It gave me a good opportunity to really get to know my bus neighbor. Then once I got there I took Las Vegas Transportation to meet my friends at the hotel. I'm also proud to say we used public transportation the entire time to make trips up and down the strip easier. I mean get real, I wasn't trying to use up all my energy trying to get from the Luxor to the Sahara.
Fendi Story:
If you've read any comments you might have seen some references to the Fendi story. Well much like L.A. Vegas has a lot of upscale stories like Prada or D&G and of course that includes Fendi. Well one night a couple of the girls went into the Fendi store to have a look around, but Mimi who had been having some problems with her knee wanted to sit down and rest for a bit. She noticed a couch across the room, but KCK pointed out that there was a couch on the side of the room near them. Mimi looks, but doesn't see the couch. KCK keeps pointing and saying it's right there. Mimi looks closely still not seeing the couch. That's when KCK notices her own reflection in the mirror. She realized that she was actually looking in a mirror and the couch she was pointing to was the one on the other side of the room. (I'm wiping a tear from my eye as I speak).
"We're happy not drunk!":
As you know Vegas is the city that never sleeps so we decided to take after that tradition and pull an all nighter Vegas Style. So 3 of us were in the casino at maybe 3 or 4 in the morning can't remember. For those of you who don't know, Vegas is the home of the cheap cocktail and in the case of casinos drinks are actually free. A cocktail waitress comes around and offers you drinks. The only deal is you're supposed to tip her. The trick is to get you drunk and keep you gambling and while you are drunk and on a winning streak you tip better. And usually people who are loud and rowdy and laughing are on a winning streak. Well Mimi, KCK, and I were on a HUGE losing streak, but it finally got to us how funny it was and we were trying to switch the money from machine to machine I barely remember why we were, but we were laughing and gambling and generally being loud and rowdy like we were drunk and on a winning streak when actually we hadn't been drinking and had pretty much lost all the money. The waitress comes up and says "Cocktail?" we all calm down instantly say "No" in a normal voice. She looks at us, makes a funny face, and walks away. And we burst out laughing again and continue to laugh and gamble. See you can have fun in Vegas without drinking and winning. You just have to be all tweaked out at 3 am.
Sorry if you wanted some really scandizzle moments, but as you know what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas so I can't share those. I will however delicately hint upon request.
Cool Moments:
-The woman who was trying to look cute "jogging" up and down the strip in Las Vegas heat.
-All of us needing to sit down in every store we came to because we needed to rest our weary bones every 15 minutes.
-Trying to spend food comp money at 4 am buying iced tea, ice cream, and hot cocoa (sorry Mimi I meant chocolate)
-Mimi trying to convince herself to go to the top of the Stratosphere, even though she was terrified.
-Dancing at Ethel M's to get free chocolate samples.
-Mimi's reaction to seeing a living statue for the first time (you know the ones who are at 3rd street)
-The girls trying to figure out the movement of our center of gravity in the inclinator.
-Getting hit on by Armenian guys
-Any other girl getting hit on by a guy and then blowing him off.
-Mimi getting pulled on stage at the Blue Man Group show.
-The girls realizing that our recovery time had definitely lengthened since college.
-Hating on people as we people watched.
-Anna turning into a photography expert a Cesar's Palace (You were pretty good too)
-Anna being hopped up on Nyquil the entire trip
-KCK making those KCK comments that everyone loves.
-Pemma just being crazy and silly
-Laughing at the guy who couldn't get into the Wynn because he didn't have sleeves.
Now I would like to share with you some of my favorite Vegas Stories / Moments:
The Bus:
Now as most of you know I don't have a car so I bus it a lot. And I have a policy that if the bus goes there then so do I, but I do have limits. Apparently Vegas isn't one of them. Although there were several alternatives I made my way (slowly) to Vegas on the Greyhound bus. It gave me a good opportunity to really get to know my bus neighbor. Then once I got there I took Las Vegas Transportation to meet my friends at the hotel. I'm also proud to say we used public transportation the entire time to make trips up and down the strip easier. I mean get real, I wasn't trying to use up all my energy trying to get from the Luxor to the Sahara.
Fendi Story:
If you've read any comments you might have seen some references to the Fendi story. Well much like L.A. Vegas has a lot of upscale stories like Prada or D&G and of course that includes Fendi. Well one night a couple of the girls went into the Fendi store to have a look around, but Mimi who had been having some problems with her knee wanted to sit down and rest for a bit. She noticed a couch across the room, but KCK pointed out that there was a couch on the side of the room near them. Mimi looks, but doesn't see the couch. KCK keeps pointing and saying it's right there. Mimi looks closely still not seeing the couch. That's when KCK notices her own reflection in the mirror. She realized that she was actually looking in a mirror and the couch she was pointing to was the one on the other side of the room. (I'm wiping a tear from my eye as I speak).
"We're happy not drunk!":
As you know Vegas is the city that never sleeps so we decided to take after that tradition and pull an all nighter Vegas Style. So 3 of us were in the casino at maybe 3 or 4 in the morning can't remember. For those of you who don't know, Vegas is the home of the cheap cocktail and in the case of casinos drinks are actually free. A cocktail waitress comes around and offers you drinks. The only deal is you're supposed to tip her. The trick is to get you drunk and keep you gambling and while you are drunk and on a winning streak you tip better. And usually people who are loud and rowdy and laughing are on a winning streak. Well Mimi, KCK, and I were on a HUGE losing streak, but it finally got to us how funny it was and we were trying to switch the money from machine to machine I barely remember why we were, but we were laughing and gambling and generally being loud and rowdy like we were drunk and on a winning streak when actually we hadn't been drinking and had pretty much lost all the money. The waitress comes up and says "Cocktail?" we all calm down instantly say "No" in a normal voice. She looks at us, makes a funny face, and walks away. And we burst out laughing again and continue to laugh and gamble. See you can have fun in Vegas without drinking and winning. You just have to be all tweaked out at 3 am.
Sorry if you wanted some really scandizzle moments, but as you know what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas so I can't share those. I will however delicately hint upon request.
Cool Moments:
-The woman who was trying to look cute "jogging" up and down the strip in Las Vegas heat.
-All of us needing to sit down in every store we came to because we needed to rest our weary bones every 15 minutes.
-Trying to spend food comp money at 4 am buying iced tea, ice cream, and hot cocoa (sorry Mimi I meant chocolate)
-Mimi trying to convince herself to go to the top of the Stratosphere, even though she was terrified.
-Dancing at Ethel M's to get free chocolate samples.
-Mimi's reaction to seeing a living statue for the first time (you know the ones who are at 3rd street)
-The girls trying to figure out the movement of our center of gravity in the inclinator.
-Getting hit on by Armenian guys
-Any other girl getting hit on by a guy and then blowing him off.
-Mimi getting pulled on stage at the Blue Man Group show.
-The girls realizing that our recovery time had definitely lengthened since college.
-Hating on people as we people watched.
-Anna turning into a photography expert a Cesar's Palace (You were pretty good too)
-Anna being hopped up on Nyquil the entire trip
-KCK making those KCK comments that everyone loves.
-Pemma just being crazy and silly
-Laughing at the guy who couldn't get into the Wynn because he didn't have sleeves.
Tuesday, May 10, 2005
O Danny Boy
My friend Daniel recently posted a story about a bust they did on a meth lab near his apartment. Now of course with all the tweakers in L.A. that doesn't seem all that strange. I mean who doesn't live near a meth lab? (jk) but seriously in the wilds of Virginia Beach were he lives it was scandizzle.
My favorite part is that he got interviewed for his reaction to what happened. You should check out the clip. (Especially if you are curious about what he looks and sound like; Sorry to put your gov't business in the streets like that Daniel, but since you won't visit CA this is the only way my friends will get to see you)
My favorite part is that he got interviewed for his reaction to what happened. You should check out the clip. (Especially if you are curious about what he looks and sound like; Sorry to put your gov't business in the streets like that Daniel, but since you won't visit CA this is the only way my friends will get to see you)
Monday, May 09, 2005
Vegasisms the Quotes...
Yes I'm back from my wild trip to Vegas. I spent a lot of time wondering if I would actually write anything about the trip. I mean who really wants to know the kinds of things that went on in Vegas ? But to appease myself I have decided to do 3 Vegas posts. Why three you ask. Well as I learned from School House Rock, "3 is a magic number." This post is devoted to some crazy quotes/conversations. I'll be more than happy to explain the situations upon request. (Sorry Lauren I know that I usually have 2 fold things) I would also like to say I had the best time with my friends. I haven't laughed that hard in a long time. I think I lost about 50 lbs. from all the laughing and walking we did. Too bad I gained 60 from all the eating.
Quotes:
-"You remind me of a drunk Japanese man!"
-"Oooooh, Jon Secada's here!" another along those lines "I didn't know Engelbert Humperdinck was here."
-"Hello housekeeping, yeah this is room 14256, we have a solid waste problem in the bathroom...yeah it's plugged up!"
-"If you dance, I'll give you some chocalate" everyone immediately starts dancing.
-"It's ok we're in vegas!" and "But what is the VEGAS time?"
-"I'm gonna drink some Nyquil to help me stay awake."
-"Go outside at night?!? Are you crazy? We're in Vegas!"
and three of my favorite conversations
Me: So where are you goin' tonight?
F: To the R-A.
Me:The R-A. You mean like the resident advisor in a dorm?
F:That's just what the club name is called.
Me: Wait a minute you're staying at the Luxor right?
F: Yeah.
Me:Do you mean Ra as in the Egyptian sun god?
F: Oh Ra! (to everyone else) Hey you guys the club is named Ra.
at 4 a.m. at the Pyramid Cafe: (remember it's 4 am and I've been awake all night)
B:What is the difference between a shake and a malt?
R: A Malt has malt powder in it.
Me:No it doesn't it has this stuff in it. (Making weird "powdery" hand gesture but continuing)
You know that stuff. What's it called? You know that powdery stuff.
R: You mean malt powder?
Me: Yeah malt powder that's it!
In the elevator going to our room at 3 a.m. 2 drunk guys and an older couple. Older couple clearly uncomfortable. (I blanked out the word for sensitive eyes. I'll tell upon request.)
Drunk guys talking: Yeah man we are going to see some ______ at 9 o'clock in the morning.
Drunk guy on phone: Make sure you are ready to go because at 9 we are going to see ______
Other drunk guy: (To me) We are going to see ______ in the morning. (I nod my head) Do you wanna see _____?
Me: (Contemplating a sarcastic comment) No thanks.
(My friends and I are trying to discretely laugh, but I wasn't as successful)
Drunk guys continue inane conversation about _______.
Drunk guy on the phone: Hey where is Mark? We have to make sure Mark knows what is going on.
Other drunk guy: (To me) Do you know Mark?
Me: No.
Drunk guy on the phone to other girls: Do you know where Mark is?
Girls: No.
Other drunk guy: Why are you lying to us?
Drunk guy on the phone: (to person on the phone)They are lying, they say they don't know who Mark is.
I burst out laughing at this point.
On the point of leaving the elevator the other drunk guy turns back and say "9 o'clock _____!"
We laughed so hard about that one. Drunk people are crazy. Anyway that's it for now. Hopefully be able to show you some pictures. We'll see I didn't take any so I must depend on the kindness of my friends. As always have a good day and enjoy.
Quotes:
-"You remind me of a drunk Japanese man!"
-"Oooooh, Jon Secada's here!" another along those lines "I didn't know Engelbert Humperdinck was here."
-"Hello housekeeping, yeah this is room 14256, we have a solid waste problem in the bathroom...yeah it's plugged up!"
-"If you dance, I'll give you some chocalate" everyone immediately starts dancing.
-"It's ok we're in vegas!" and "But what is the VEGAS time?"
-"I'm gonna drink some Nyquil to help me stay awake."
-"Go outside at night?!? Are you crazy? We're in Vegas!"
and three of my favorite conversations
Me: So where are you goin' tonight?
F: To the R-A.
Me:The R-A. You mean like the resident advisor in a dorm?
F:That's just what the club name is called.
Me: Wait a minute you're staying at the Luxor right?
F: Yeah.
Me:Do you mean Ra as in the Egyptian sun god?
F: Oh Ra! (to everyone else) Hey you guys the club is named Ra.
at 4 a.m. at the Pyramid Cafe: (remember it's 4 am and I've been awake all night)
B:What is the difference between a shake and a malt?
R: A Malt has malt powder in it.
Me:No it doesn't it has this stuff in it. (Making weird "powdery" hand gesture but continuing)
You know that stuff. What's it called? You know that powdery stuff.
R: You mean malt powder?
Me: Yeah malt powder that's it!
In the elevator going to our room at 3 a.m. 2 drunk guys and an older couple. Older couple clearly uncomfortable. (I blanked out the word for sensitive eyes. I'll tell upon request.)
Drunk guys talking: Yeah man we are going to see some ______ at 9 o'clock in the morning.
Drunk guy on phone: Make sure you are ready to go because at 9 we are going to see ______
Other drunk guy: (To me) We are going to see ______ in the morning. (I nod my head) Do you wanna see _____?
Me: (Contemplating a sarcastic comment) No thanks.
(My friends and I are trying to discretely laugh, but I wasn't as successful)
Drunk guys continue inane conversation about _______.
Drunk guy on the phone: Hey where is Mark? We have to make sure Mark knows what is going on.
Other drunk guy: (To me) Do you know Mark?
Me: No.
Drunk guy on the phone to other girls: Do you know where Mark is?
Girls: No.
Other drunk guy: Why are you lying to us?
Drunk guy on the phone: (to person on the phone)They are lying, they say they don't know who Mark is.
I burst out laughing at this point.
On the point of leaving the elevator the other drunk guy turns back and say "9 o'clock _____!"
We laughed so hard about that one. Drunk people are crazy. Anyway that's it for now. Hopefully be able to show you some pictures. We'll see I didn't take any so I must depend on the kindness of my friends. As always have a good day and enjoy.
Thursday, May 05, 2005
Wilin' Out...
Although there are plenty of times when I don't post for days (weeks) at a time. This time it is legitimate. I will be spending the next couple of days wilin' out in Las Vegas in case you didn't know. I will be writing a tell all post when I get back. I know I know. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, but I also have a saying...If I don't do it outside of Vegas I sure ain't doing inside of Vegas.
So have a good weekend everyone and happy Cinco de Mayo.
As always have a good day and enjoy.
So have a good weekend everyone and happy Cinco de Mayo.
As always have a good day and enjoy.
Tuesday, May 03, 2005
Tanika's Relationship Tip #8
Yes, I have decided to devote one entire post to a relationship tip. But this is something that I've been thinking about for a while so now it's status has been elevated above a mere apendage.
In the true Dan Brown fashion:
FACT- No one is perfect, so thinking that if you can just do everything perfect in a relationship to make it work isn't going to work.
Recently I've had a friend who has been in a difficult relationship with his significant other. I spend a lot of time just letting him talk out his feelings because I know that's how he processes best. The thing that keeps coming up the most is that he says he has been doing everything right. Wondering, why isn't it working out? He said one of his biggest fears is that if he doesn't do everything right then there is another guy waiting to take his place and do everything "right" with his girlfriend. I have to admit I have fallen into this trap myself which is why I don't give my friend a hard time. I think that if I'm the perfect girlfriend then that should make my boyfriend happy and everything will be perfect.
Over the past couple of weeks I started listening to things that people say who are in a relationship. A common thread in all the conversations, especially those coming from people in a rocky or defunct relationship, is that at least one person felt like they did everything right and why wasn't it working. Constantly berating themselves wondering what should they have done? What did they do that wasn't quite right in the first place? Why weren't they good enough? What can they do to make the other person happy and want to be with them? Clinging to the hope that somehow there is a secret formula of actions that will make everything ok.
In the course of writing these relationship tips I've realized that there isn't some formulaic way to have a perfect relationship. And it definitely isn't being the perfect person. When expressing my frustration about finding a guy who is into the same things I'm into a wise friend told me that in relationships its also about adapting to the other person not always making sure everything about you coincides. Which of course makes perfect sense and I'm glad she pointed it out. That's one of the points I want to stress about all my tips. They are just there to help bring clarity to a situation where I feel thinking and good judgment can become clouded for whatever reasons.
I guess the reason I felt like making this tip it's own post is because it gets to me watching people beat themselves up about something that isn't their responsibility in the first place (i.e. being perfect). Seeing people value themselves by what they THINK they should be doing, then feeling like somehow they have fallen short and somehow their worth is lessened because the person they poured themselves into didn't "appreciate" all their efforts. When a relationship takes the work of both parties adapting, learning, and growing together.
Anyway as usual have a good day and enjoy.
In the true Dan Brown fashion:
FACT- No one is perfect, so thinking that if you can just do everything perfect in a relationship to make it work isn't going to work.
Recently I've had a friend who has been in a difficult relationship with his significant other. I spend a lot of time just letting him talk out his feelings because I know that's how he processes best. The thing that keeps coming up the most is that he says he has been doing everything right. Wondering, why isn't it working out? He said one of his biggest fears is that if he doesn't do everything right then there is another guy waiting to take his place and do everything "right" with his girlfriend. I have to admit I have fallen into this trap myself which is why I don't give my friend a hard time. I think that if I'm the perfect girlfriend then that should make my boyfriend happy and everything will be perfect.
Over the past couple of weeks I started listening to things that people say who are in a relationship. A common thread in all the conversations, especially those coming from people in a rocky or defunct relationship, is that at least one person felt like they did everything right and why wasn't it working. Constantly berating themselves wondering what should they have done? What did they do that wasn't quite right in the first place? Why weren't they good enough? What can they do to make the other person happy and want to be with them? Clinging to the hope that somehow there is a secret formula of actions that will make everything ok.
In the course of writing these relationship tips I've realized that there isn't some formulaic way to have a perfect relationship. And it definitely isn't being the perfect person. When expressing my frustration about finding a guy who is into the same things I'm into a wise friend told me that in relationships its also about adapting to the other person not always making sure everything about you coincides. Which of course makes perfect sense and I'm glad she pointed it out. That's one of the points I want to stress about all my tips. They are just there to help bring clarity to a situation where I feel thinking and good judgment can become clouded for whatever reasons.
I guess the reason I felt like making this tip it's own post is because it gets to me watching people beat themselves up about something that isn't their responsibility in the first place (i.e. being perfect). Seeing people value themselves by what they THINK they should be doing, then feeling like somehow they have fallen short and somehow their worth is lessened because the person they poured themselves into didn't "appreciate" all their efforts. When a relationship takes the work of both parties adapting, learning, and growing together.
Anyway as usual have a good day and enjoy.
Monday, May 02, 2005
Tanikaism(schisms) Revised Edition
This list has been edited for accuracy
Things I like:
Bagpipes (is there any better music?)
Jane Austen novels/movies
What a fool believes - Doobie Brothers
Anything by the BeeGees
Green
Children
Rainy / Cloudy days
Anything I can read
AND OF COURSE
*Skinny Geeky White Guys (Sorry I left that out the first time, thanks for pointing it out Daniel)
Things I don't like:
Public Restrooms / Port-a-potties
Wet hair
Wet tissue paper
Chicken
Raisins
Overly Bright Sunny Days
chartreuse (I mean really)
Things I'm afraid of:
Soggy Cereal
Public Restrooms
Soggy Cereal in a public restroom
Small children who are really good ticklers
Undercooked Red Meat
Curly Fries (don't ask)
Have a good day and as always enjoy.
Things I like:
Bagpipes (is there any better music?)
Jane Austen novels/movies
What a fool believes - Doobie Brothers
Anything by the BeeGees
Green
Children
Rainy / Cloudy days
Anything I can read
AND OF COURSE
*Skinny Geeky White Guys (Sorry I left that out the first time, thanks for pointing it out Daniel)
Things I don't like:
Public Restrooms / Port-a-potties
Wet hair
Wet tissue paper
Chicken
Raisins
Overly Bright Sunny Days
chartreuse (I mean really)
Things I'm afraid of:
Soggy Cereal
Public Restrooms
Soggy Cereal in a public restroom
Small children who are really good ticklers
Undercooked Red Meat
Curly Fries (don't ask)
Have a good day and as always enjoy.
Sunday, May 01, 2005
He Said, She Said
Sometimes in the course of a conversation ideas and meanings get "lost in the shuffle". You're trying to explain yourself, but in the process things end up sounding very different.
-What he said:
I think we need some time apart.
What she heard:
I can't stand you and I never what to see you again.
-What she said:
I think we need to take our relationship to the next level.
What he heard:
You need to start spending your every waking (and sleeping) moment with ME!
-What he said:
This is the way I am, you have to accept me and not try to change me.
What she heard:
I know I'm a slob, but this is the best you're gonna get.
-What she said:
I need someone who will nuture me and help me grow.
What he heard:
I'm already dating your friend Greg. (Sorry about that Greg)
-What he said:
I need to focus on me right now and get my things together.
What she heard:
You're not important enough to me to make sure we spend quality time together.
Just some thoughts as always enjoy.
-What he said:
I think we need some time apart.
What she heard:
I can't stand you and I never what to see you again.
-What she said:
I think we need to take our relationship to the next level.
What he heard:
You need to start spending your every waking (and sleeping) moment with ME!
-What he said:
This is the way I am, you have to accept me and not try to change me.
What she heard:
I know I'm a slob, but this is the best you're gonna get.
-What she said:
I need someone who will nuture me and help me grow.
What he heard:
I'm already dating your friend Greg. (Sorry about that Greg)
-What he said:
I need to focus on me right now and get my things together.
What she heard:
You're not important enough to me to make sure we spend quality time together.
Just some thoughts as always enjoy.
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